Thursday, May 22, 2008

in a dark place

few days ago denotes 24 years i walk this spinning rock
thank you for all the wishes n the whole weekend long of cakes n celebrations n the bday tokens too
as always the wishes of long, happy life n murah rezeki is most appreciated and valued
but one wish not so welcomed is the one for me to find some guy n tie a knot ASAP or at least find a guy n be in a relationship ASAP
i know these ppl meant well but this is one of the thing u dun wanna push it with me
n coming from u who is glowing with happiness from getting hitched soon makes it feel like a slap in the face
as if i meant nothing if there is no guy attached
as if i am a failure
as if i'm inadequate
i'm glad it work out for u n i am really happy for u, i really do
but just because it work for u doesn't mean it'll work for me too n my life works just fine for me these days
i'm still optimistic n everything but right now, i have bigger things to do n i hate the notion dat my purpose to be on this rock is solely for reproduction n survival of homo sapiens
i'll get there, i hope but not now
so for now, just lay it off ok?

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

hello ct..happy belated bday!

i dunno why, tp somehow selalu girls yg dpt wish "semoga kawin cepat" hehe

CT DALILAH said...

hey zek..lame x nmpak.thanks!

see...double standard, nobody bising if guy stay single as if the only reason why girl exist is to get married *hmphhhhh*

pinksterz said...

eh eh it was your bday!

happy belated.

haha about the relationship thingie.

just be grateful u r not in egypt. people here think 24 is "too old/anakdaratua wtf" and must kahwin d wtf. -.-" and the guys here (mostly) are into marriage topic. aaaa tension *pulls hair*

Anonymous said...

lama gk ah. but i'm back now. :-)

Anonymous said...

hehe *hugs*
Ignore people like that.

Some people dont understand that now is the best time to be single - when we're still young with lots of dreams, subjectively adorable (hehe) and full of energy :D

When we're old and need someone to take care of us, then oh well, let's find a guy :p Haha

But we have bigger dreams, right? That's why we're in med school.

CT DALILAH said...

pinksterz: yeah, dat shucksss! wtf indeed

zek: welcome back hehe

leeshi: *hugs* u r absolutely right... we have bigger things in our life right now. med school first!

laily said...

your bday ka??
aiseh, tak tau!
blessed birthday, dalilah :)

CT DALILAH said...

laily: it's ok heheh thanks!